ethics-signStory 1

Teacher to father of a primary class student : Your son today took a pencil from his friend’s pencil box without asking him.

Father to teacher : I am so sorry teacher, I give him everything he needs so I am not sure why he would do it. I would ensure he does not do it again.  I am very sorry!

Father gets home, calls his little son and angrily reacts,

Father to son : This has been the most embarrassing day in my life. Your teacher told me that you took the pencil of your friend from his pencil box, without telling him.  This is disgusting and I am very angry and feeling ashamed my son could do this.

If you wanted, I could have got you a dozen from my workplace!

 

Story 2

Vijay has been an average person in his profession, however wanted to move on from present job for few reasons. He appears for interview of company 1, get selected, accepts the offer to join the company 1.  With no worry of staying in the current company, he starts hunting for a better offer than offer he received from company 1, due to his little knowledge, previous experience and desperate need of hiring company, he soon gets offer 2 from company 2 and soon an offer 3 from company 3.

He is very proud of his own efforts to collect and accept so many offers from different companies and finally tries to resign from his present company.  Of course, despite him having 3 offers with him, first thing he tries is to negotiate better terms with the existing company, just in case he can juice most from them.  Well, the present company is unable to match the offer made by companies outside and decides to let him go.

Still undecided where to join, he sends letter of acceptance to all three companies with the thought that he would decide whom to join later.  He feels its an honor to have options in hand till last date.  So finally on the day of joining, without informing company 1 & company 3 he joins company 2 and starts working.

He is proud of his own career, the decisions he has made while switching the job and collection of offers he could gather (in this case 3) during the transition.  He is extremely happy telling how he turned down offers from company 1 and company 3 to everyone.

Do the above stories look familiar?

If yes, do you think in our present life ‘little bit cheating’ is now part of ethics and corporates are warming up to this fact?

Do let me know.

Note – by the way the name ‘Vijay’ was the most familiar name I could remember. No pun intended towards any specific person.

 

13th July 2010 is a very special day for us.  After all, my daughter Sanika, turns 5 on that day.

All these 5 years have been a journey of self discovery for me.  Being with Sanika all these years, observing her, teaching her, fighting with her, talking to her, loving her and sometimes scolding her has taught me several lessons in life. 

As she turns 5 today, I would like to share few lessons I have learnt in my life from Sanika which will stay with me for life.

 

sanika4Be inquisitive

Sanika has a curious mind and she always wants to know reasons on what we are doing. She always observes the situation and keeps on asking the questions until she is satisfied, or … I am absolutely irritated with her questions.  Why? is her favourite question. 

I believe asking right questions is a very positive thing one should do in life. Most of the times we assume things and keep quite and assumptions do not often turn true, hence eventually getting into conflicts etc., Sanika teaches me to ask questions about situation and myself until the time I am satisfied.

 

 

 

sanika3 Be unconditionally positive

One of the best part of being a child, is that world always beautiful. Sanika teaches me to be unconditionally positive about everything. 

She has one basic assumption.  “The world is full of good people, until proven otherwise” and her responses based on this assumption make everyone around her happy.

Over a period of time when we grow up, we tend to observe and remember bad experiences far longer than simple good experiences. Thus making us forget this basic life principle. If you think carefully, as we grow up, we tend to make our assumption as “World is full of wicked, bad people, until proven otherwise”. The more we think like this, tougher the life becomes.

 

 

sanu Forgive and patch up !

Yes, it takes guts to forgive and patch up with someone whom you have just fought. Myself and Sanika often get into conflicting situations, resulting into fights and us both not talking to each other for a while. However, more often than not Sanika makes first move to patch up and I appreciate her for that.

As we grow up, our ego grows up too and sometimes it becomes more powerful than what we ourselves are. Thus, preventing us to make a first move in order to resolve the conflict.

Sanika teaches me to be myself in the conflicting situations to avoid further damage to relationships etc.

 

 

SI850717 [1024x768] Explore the world !

Sanika is a brave girl who likes to explore new things in life. Probably it comes from the fact that she has been a huge fan and follower of the cartoon character of Dora the explorer.  She loves the character so much that in her early ages she used to pretend to be Dora, relegating me to carry out the duties of Boots the Monkey !

Often, this bravery has landed us in big troubles. Especially when she ‘escapes’ to explore things in a big shopping mall herself.  The lesson that Sanika gives me here is to keep an open mind to new experiences and situations. She makes her moves / decisions based on the situation as it comes and does now allow her presumptions, assumptions to come in her way to respond in a different way than normal.

 

 

SI852685 Know what you really want, just go for it !

Sanika, at this early age, knows what she wants to do and has developed few passions.  Swimming has been one of the passions that she has developed. She was always fan of water games, however since last few months she has developed a tremendous passion for Swimming and has learnt it within few weeks.  Believe me, I did not support her in the venture as I myself do not know swimming. She persisted and pestered her grand father to teach her swimming and did not leave it until she has learnt it completely herself. 

Her current passion is cycling !

I think it is important lesson for everyone to know what they really want to. Moreover, be fully committed to achieve it in life. Most of the people, I have seen prefer being driven by system or surroundings, however Sanika teaches me to have goals in life and be fully dedicated to achieve it.

 

Indeed, someone has said, its never too late to learn … but in Sanika’s case its equally true that its never too early to teach 🙂 !

 

Earlier I wrote another blog about how my younger son teaches me important lessons of life.  You may read them here ‘5 things to learn from 6 month olds!’

Last 4 days, I was fortunate to be part of the ‘Leadership Management Workshop’ and I must acknowledge these days have been an exhilarating, self realizing & self discovering experience.

Being in Amdocs, a company that really makes an effort of developing leadership through specialized programmes such as this one, has been of immense value to me over last 6 months as I am able to get into lot of such workshops / trainings to enhance myself.

leadership Coming back to the workshop that was conducted by Raj Mali, who calls him self a corporate mystic, was conducted over a period of 4 days and had several engaging discussions that ultimately led to the group understanding the secrets of successful corporate leadership. 

Its do have lots to write about the experience of last 4 days and I would be genuinely attempting to write few articles on my experience of last 4 days and how I have grasped, understood and learnt few things. This is obviously the first attempt to start a series of the discussions on the topic of ‘Leadership’.

Our training group of 10 was consisted of managers across various competency centres of Amdocs, some of us were new and coming from other organizations and few of them were veterans who are with the company for close to 10 years or so, thus making it one of the more diverse forums and at the same time, an interesting one.

The common pattern of the last 4 days was consistent. More focus was given on group discussions, observations, role plays and games. It was so surprising that the amount multimedia that was involved was very less. More details on the same, with genuine hope, I will be able to post in coming days on my blog.

 

In this article, I want to reflect on the very first topic that we discussed in the programme and that was a simple question,

 

“What do you think leadership means to you?”

 

On the face value of the question, it looks very simple to everyone, however what surprised me and probably others was that when this was thrown at us, we had really take a pause and think, what it really means?

Few interesting answers that came out of the discussion were,

– Leadership is all about getting things done on time within budget & costs

– Leadership means helping your team grow

– Its about people management

– Its about how you handle issues and the pressure cooker situations

– Leadership is how you motivate people to do their jobs

– Leadership is about managing the work and team

– Leadership is controlling the behaviour and emotions of self and influencing in others

– Leadership is all about setting the rules and helping the followers follow them !

and the answer I gave was “Leadership is all about taking risks and making key decisions that help you grow your team”.  

However, after the session is now complete, what I have understood about leadership is as follows,

Leadership is not a science, its an art.

Its an art on how you understand the mindset of individuals as well as groups, connect with people of various styles and patterns and still form a successful team and achieve a common goal of growth & success. However, none of the above is possible, without yourself making a conscious effort to understand yourself, your own emotions and learn to control and channelize them to create positive energy around.

 

Leadership is demonstrated by various people and they have unique style of executing leadership within the group.  Raj, very effectively classifies all the styles into 4 simple categories and had easily explained them through two games, one group and other pair.

I would like to mention about the games in next article, however, till then, I would like to know your view on what you perceive leadership as and if you have to define, how would be defining the same?

Let me know !

Smile !My son Shrav became 6 months old last in March and has now grown into a very naughty boy.  Just observing him makes me feel a lot better and happier.

Although he is only 6 months, he still has provided me with few valuable lessons in my life.

1. Smile !

Sharv looks at everyone and smiles. He makes everyone’s day and we love him for that !

Explore !2. Explore !

Since he is able to move his hands and roll around, he has started to explore lot of things. Anything that comes under his radar, he grabs and instantly starts exploring it with his touch and taste senses ! While exploring he would show lot of curiosity which I believe is important to learn any new thing in life !!

3. Express !

Expressing emotions and feelings are very important for self health. I mentioned about that in my previous post on this blog. Sharv never stays away from shouting or crying or laughing if he feels like doing so. If he is not getting enough attention, he would shout.  If something is bothering him, he would give the loudest cry in the world and if he is happy, he would keep on smiling and laughing !

Relax ! 4. Fearless !

Although he would never know at this age what fear is and what should be done, not done. He holds no fear in trying new things. There has been couple of instances that he has launched himself off the sofa or the bed while playing with his toys. Yes, he would cry very loud but will do it again 🙂

5. Relax !

After bath will be his most relaxing period.  He loves playing with water during his bath and loves to relax after his bath time workout is done. He likes to take enough sleep and does not stretch himself just for the sake of staying awake !

My daughter as well had taught all above to me when she was 6 months ! Pity, I did not have this blog back then.

 

Recently, my father, (Prof. R. K. Deshpande) retired from long and distinguished service service as a Botany Lecturer in Science college and on the occasion of his retirement and I had a privilege to be part of his last day at his work and the small facilitation by his department in his honour.

It was a wonderful occasion of honouring a career that spanned over almost 3 decades and with various achievements, it was great to see his colleagues acknowledging his contribution to their career, work and the legacy he has been leaving behind.

His work life has taught few very important lessons especially to me which I would like to remember forever my life and practice the.  

“Problems will always be there, you need to find a solution and move ahead.”

A career spanning over three decades, for sure, would have had its fair share of troubles and problems. However, he had always followed the principle of facing the problems and finding his way out rather than worrying over the problems and their impacts. He is of firm belief that every problem is mitigable and we must strive to solve the problems and ensure they do not arise later.

“Discipline, hard work & foresight are three pillars of success.”

Discipline, hard work & foresight are very important aspects for getting a success in life.  He taught us the fact that all three must go together if you want to achieve greater success in life. If you leave one out, then you are in a danger of not fulfilling your potential.

“Have your own principles, thoughts and be firm with them.”

My father always encouraged us to take our own decisions in life then be it the choice of school. college, subjects or courses or even wife. He had given us a greater freedom of ensuring that we are responsible for making the decisions that affect our life.  He had never enforced his opinion or rule on us which we simply had to abide by. He is a man of principles and has followed them all his life and had never compromised on them and so does he encourages us to do in our respective lives.

You would not believe the fact that although I was a student in the same college he was a lecturer in, he gave me a freedom NOT to choose his subject for my college education and go for other subjects !

“Do something that interests you, apart from your job !”

My dad has been a versatile personality. Although he had been a teaching professional all his life, his multi faceted personality had shades of being an excellent singer, a very good musician, a very capable stage actor and a very social person. He had composed many songs, given a voice to them and had his music shows at quite a few places across Maharashtra. He also had a keen interest in acting and had played various characters in various stage plays and again had toured across various places in Maharashtra.  He still does have a passion for music and arts and that is something amazes me of his personality. 

Hats off to his work in the creative field and I can only wish I could have so many talents in me !

 

Papa, You are a great human being, a humble man and source of inspiration for our family and we all love you !